If you follow me on social media, you may have seen me mention that I have had a few rough days with my mental health recently. I make no secret of the fact that I suffer from anxiety, depression and seasonal affective disorder, and I have my good days and bad days. My SAD does mean that the bad days are generally more frequent in the autumn and winter months, and I have definitely struggled this year when the weather is gloomy, especially with the current pandemic going on at the same time, making everything seem ten times harder for so many people, myself included.
We are meant to be exchanging on our new house this week, but there is a delay, which is causing me a lot of stress, I just want it to be sorted now, as we really hoped to get the keys before Christmas, which probably won’t happen if the exchange doesn’t go ahead on Friday.
I am also struggling with being at home on my own so much. Although being home has meant I have had the time to sort and pack up our belongings, it has also meant having a lot of time in my own head, which is not great for my anxiety. I tend to overthink everything when I am not keeping myself busy, and I can find things harder to cope with as a result.
I absolutely love Christmas, and usually the weeks leading up to the day itself are so exciting and filled with festive events. This year I have barely any plans, due to covid putting a stop to pretty much everything I would normally be doing. I have tried to think outside of the box and plan activities which are allowed whilst we are in tier 2, but I am still sad that Christmas won’t be the same as usual this year, especially not being able to spend the day with my family, as my nan is being extra cautious due to her age and health conditions.
I have booked a drive in cinema for a few days before Christmas, and we will potentially be heading to the circus as well, which will be really fun. Ultimately I just want to try and have a chilled, cosy Christmas with the kids, and my dad who will be travelling from Essex to spend time with us.
If you are struggling, remember that it is perfectly normal to find this time of year difficult, and many others are going through similar. This year has been a big strain on all of us, and if you would rather just hibernate until things get a little better, that is totally understandable. Christmas might be ‘ the most wonderful time of the year’ for many, but for some, it is stressful and lonely. Reach out to loved ones, check in on your neighbours, and try and spread some kindness whilst we continue to make it through the pandemic.
If you are finding things hard to cope with, you can read up about anxiety on the NHS website or call the Samaritans to talk about how you are feeling.
