So I can count my total friends on my fingers… And those best friends, that you can count on for absolutely anything, can call when it comes crashing down, can rely on no matter what? I’ve probably got one, two at the most.
When I was younger, like most people, I was surrounded by lots of ‘friends’, there was a big group of us and it was nice to feel included, to be a part of the gang.
As time went on and we left school, started university, started to grow up and move on with our lives, a smaller group of us would still make the effort to meet up during the holidays, at Easter, summer and Christmas.
As I’ve grown up I’ve come to realise that although having lots of friends can be nice, it’s much better to have a smaller amount of true friends than those people who will be there for you when the sun is shining and nowhere to be seen when you hit a rough patch.
Fake friends are utterly useless and I’ve come to realise I don’t need them. Every now and again I’ll have a social media clear out, unfriending those people who don’t really take part in my life, who are just kind of there watching from the sidelines.
I won’t lie, when I have lost someone I considered to be a true friend, it has hurt. Most notably is when that friend cuts you off without a reason, without a goodbye. And when you can see yourself losing an old friend slowly, that is also painful.
Ultimately though, now I am a mum, I try and focus on the positives. I am fortunate to see my mum, sister, sister in law and other family members as friends, which is something not everyone can say. And as cliched as it may be, Ed is also my friend. We can tell each other anything, slob out in front of the TV together, go out together.