You Know You’re in Lockdown When…

So, the UK are still in lockdown, at least officially, and I thought I would round up some common occurrences you may have experienced since the government imposed quarantine back in mid March.

You know you’re in lockdown when….

You have to check your phone to remind yourself what day it is

You have finished everything on your ‘to watch’ list on Netflix

You may actually have to restock your TBR book pile

You have actually completed your first puzzle since childhood, and enjoyed it

You have seen your Deliveroo driver more often than your parents

Your social live consists of weekly Zoom quizzes and the occasional socially distanced chat with a friend

Going to the supermarket feels like preparing to climb Everest

Getting a Sainsburys click and collect slot feels like winning the lottery

You have spent all the money you’ve saved on fuel on Amazon

Putting the recycling bin out sounds a lot louder than it did before – those empty wine bottles don’t half make a lot of noise

You’ve shared images from the news of local beauty spots teeming with people to the group chat with the caption ‘second wave coming’

You have taken to Twitter to discuss said agievances with people flocking to the area you live in

You have joined TikTok and are now addicted

You are starting to forget how it feels to work in the office and are now 100% invested in working from home

You are serious need of a hairdresser

You have come to realise how boring your daily life is without social interaction, after uploading your tenth food picture to Instagram stories

Speaking of food. You get your food shop on a Friday and have no food left by Monday….

Finding plain flour, eggs and (bizarrely) tinned pineapple is like winning the jackpot

The Government Briefing each day has become the new must watch show that everybody is talking about

You have received an email with the words ‘new normal’ and ‘these unprecedented times’ more often than you care to recall

The money you have saved on your commute has largely been spent on clothing deliveries and food

You no longer fit in your pre-lockdown jeans

You haven’t worn a bra for over a week

The Thursday evening clap brought your neighbours together, but also reminded you why you never got on with Sue and Dave at number 20… a French horn, really?

Your best intentions to workout each morning, eat healthy salads and get more sleep fell by the wayside in week three and your diet has begun to resemble the period between Christmas and New Year, but with more cheese and less Turkey.

You weren’t that bothered about McDonalds opening again as you are now on first name terms with your local restaurant, and their burgers taste better

January feels like a lifetime ago. It was a simpler time.

No news headlines shock you anymore. Madeleine McCann mystery may have finally been solved. 2020 has been wild, and there’s still 6 months left…

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